Some Thought

Wherever you go, go with all your heart.
~Confucius

I can't stop thinking of how things are goanna be when you're gone. I can't stop myself from crying even though crying doesn't make me feel any better afterward. I'm a mess. I won't lie about it. & I know I've been a terrible terrible person. I don't deserve any love from you. I don't deserve the way you treat me right now. I don't deserve hugs to make me feel better. Last but not least, I don't deserve someone like you. I screwed it big time. I was the one that messed up. I ruined the best damn thing that happened in my life. & I had to lose you in order to realize it.I hate this, I really do. & To make things worst, I was never there for you like the way I said that i would be. I was the one that made this decision, I was the one that insist on this. & Right now I very much would like to take everything back. But that's just far too impossible to happen. You deserve to be happy, you really do (: and to see that you are happy, i am happy.